I spend at least an hour in the car each weekday morning (and again each evening). And if I’m really lucky, there is a traffic jam or accident that keeps me gridlocked for upwards of 90 minutes or longer…such has been the case more often than not over the last several weeks. Much like checking out at the supermarket, whichever lane I choose is the wrong one for advancement.
It’s not all bad, though. There’s something to be said for quiet times of contemplation—”quiet” in this context ignores my loud stereo and occasional shouting at other drivers.
Yes, I do some of my best thinking in the car…and promptly forget most of it unless I immediately post to twitter/facebook or dictate to Siri. And then there are the less compelling notions that traverse my synapses. I can’t imagine all of the bizarre things the people behind Siri must hear. Probably drivel along these lines:
I really love the phrase “dog and pony show.” Also, I’d love to see a real dog and pony show; just sounds like fun.
I need a helicopter. I’ve co-piloted an airplane before in flying lessons, can’t be that different. Then I could get a cool flight suit. Plus, then I could say “flight SUIT UP!”
The ability to pilot a flying machine would make me a valuable asset in the zombie apocalypse. There’s a fair chance I could navigate without killing us. And if I didn’t…well it’s probably better to die in a fiery crash than to watch/feel a reanimated corpse gnaw on my entrails.
Actually, I’d be handy even if I couldn’t fly since I can shoot a gun pretty well. I should probably invest in lasik eye surgery before the apocalypse. Trying to keep track of glasses would suck.
Oh, crap! I’m sooooooo sorry, guy behind me. I honestly didn’t see you when I cut over into this lane; you were in my blind spot. Please don’t shoot me. Look, I’m waving to apologize. You’re waving back, so that means we’re good, right? Huh, that’s not waving.
There are Hannah Montana and Jonas Brothers songs on my iPod. This should embarrass me, and I should skip them. It doesn’t, and I don’t.
Pretty sure I had no idea what the words of ‘Whoomp! There It Is’ meant when I was a 6th-grader. Glad there’s no one around to hear my giggles. Gotta skip this one.
I should probably get around to watching The Matrix some day.
“I’m so fancy…something something something…in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo.”
Wait, was that an armadillo? When did armadillos start living this far north? I’ve gotta call my mom.
Severus and I had lunch yesterday, during which time we discussed The Walking Dead.
Well, technically, I talked at length about it and he listened.
Severus is not a fan of said program due to the gore.
Our conversation ended with this…
Severus: I really just don’t like watching them kill the zombies.
Me: so I guess you’ll be one of the first to go in the event of an actual zombie apocalypse.
Severus: yeah, I’ll sacrifice myself so you can run away.
Me: don’t worry, I would’ve pushed you anyway.
That, friends, is love in the zombie apocalypse.
Have you seen the news today?!
North Korea is testing nuclear weapons again.
There’s an asteroid hurtling towards earth, set to come even closer than most of our satellites.
The Pope is resigning for, like, the first time in the history of forever.
Oh, and there’s the Zombie Apocalypse in Montana—a strange place given the relative lack of substantive zombie food source (aka people).
Maybe it’s time to start stocking supplies and building that bunker on my property 😉